Specializing for 15 years treating clients suffering from compulsive sexual behaviors, I reassure them that I believe them. From my own past experience of compulsive love, romantic and sexual behaviors, I keenly understand the shame, pain and fear (terror) for the client that if the behaviors don't stop and I know they have tried many, many times, that one can feel hopeless and depressed. Many of them have been able to stop these behaviors for some amount of time, but "staying stopped" is nearly impossible to do without treatment, whether that be psychotherapy, group support or both. The lay person better understands that those addicted to drugs, alcohol, or even a behavior like gambling, however, sex compulsions or "sex addiction" as it is colloquially called is still a widely disagreed upon phenomena that many still believe is more of a moral issue than a mental illness or compulsive or impulsive disorder.

'Staying stopped' is much more difficult. Many folks have told me that once they have been caught, or almost been caught, they have had weeks or months of no "acting out", however, the fear of getting caught almost never seems to be enough to keep the behaviors at bay permanently. I explain to many of my clients that it's an impossible goal - to stop all sexual activity for months or years is never in and of itself a "cure". It's more of an effort to control this bodily drive. At some point, when they want to be sexual with their partner, they may have difficulty functioning sexually, their partner often notices which brings up the dreaded conversation of "what's wrong" or "are you doing it again".

SEX IS A NORMAL HUMAN DRIVE, not unlike hunger; the need for food will eventually over-ride the will-power of the human. Drugs, alcohol, and gambling are in no way a human need, and thus, easier to 'quit'. Often, the early steps of treatment involved some of the following:

• Assessment of the scope of the problem
• Psycho-education about human sexuality
• Assessment of any kind of child abuse (including whether either parent had an addiction or compulsive sexual behaviors)
• Shame reduction and help de-stigmatizing this problem
• Create a "healthy sexual template" of they would like their sex and romantic life to be.

Ultimately sex should be a healthy, life-affirming force, rather than a shame and guilt-inducing compulsive nightmare.

I am not only a seasoned psychotherapist, I have been in recovery from compulsive behaviors for 15 years and have extensive knowledge of the research and clinical best practices, I have lived many years of my life with this problem. It is treatable. I provide a safe, private, and therapeutic environment for you to discuss sensitive topics in complete confidentiality.

I have worked with clients in therapy for more than 25 years and have witnessed how this originally unrecognized disorder transformed from a 'moralistic' or self-control issue to better and better understanding of the neurobiology of addiction, how it is linked to relationships as well as to attachment disorder. I feel honored that my clients trust me with the most vulnerable memories or feelings, and my empathy comes from remembering my suffering and fears at times that I couldn't "get better".

Currently, I provide video (telehealth) psychotherapy sessions, both individual and group therapy to residents of California and Texas . Schedule the type and length of appointment you prefer with Dr. Lara Dye.